No more dust bunnies with the new bObsweep !
….launched a major crackdown last w/end on Highway #6, from one end (Tobermory? in the north) to the other (Pt. Dover in the south)….and all points in between! They had/have a catchy name for the operation/blitz but it escapes me at the moment. Bottom line is that there are FAR too many drivers ‘getting their kicks on Highway #6’. The first w/end netted two or three dozen arrests….of course, plenty of your ‘normal’ speeding tickets; then ‘excessive’ speeding; as well as ‘stunt driving’, which methinks is what they now call ‘REALLY excessive speeding’…you know, the one where you hand them your car keys, then memorize Bell Cab’s fone # and grab a city bus schedule. Also, there was a driver who had mary wanna ‘clearly available’ in her vehicle, and (Rotzy’s only guessing) was enjoying a dube, cops or no cops; lastly was a driver who had a radar detector in the vehicle (illegal)….tho it seems the apparatus wasn’t working, or working properly. The crackdown is on w/ends and will last as long as necessary. Excessive speed is also being blamed by Mayor John Tory for the ever-growing number of pedestrian deaths on T.O. streets….mostly involving the elderly.
L.O.T.W. Week 2
The “F/N” Lyrics Of The Week Contest really caught on with the readership, and yours truly isn’t all that surprised….we ALL want/need to have some funn, eh? Add that all-inclusive trip to Hawaii for the contest winner into the mix, and Bob’s your uncle! Not to mention the fact that after 10-15 years, and getting to know a goodly number of readers ‘preferences’, Rotzy’s betting that a large majority of y’all are ‘into music’. Well, that was proven clearly by the number of responses to be fact. Anyway, here are a few which caught the judges’ attention! *I’m having day dreams about night dreams in the middle of the afternoon*….by Ronnie Milsap, early 1960’s. *I’ve got tears in my ears from lyin’ on my back while I cry my eyes out over you*….by Homer and Jethro 1963. *They’re coming to take me away Ha-Haa….to the funny farm, Ho-Ho.*….Jerry Samuels…aka N. Bonaparte…July ’66. *Drop-kick me Jesus through the goal-posts of life*….Bobby Bare….from the album Winners And Other Losers 1976. So….SO….send YOUR favourite lyrics from any and all music genres in to email@example.com….as many as y’all want, and we’ll accept ’em as long as they’re still coming….and as you see you will remain anonymous.
A New Guy At #555
He arrived here one afternoon last week….Wed?….two loud knocks on the unit #303 door, which Miz. Jo answered immediately, initially seeing no one, then glancing up and down the hall, then downward, and there he was leaning against the wall! Bob. Bob Sweep. Dropped off by some FedEx-type guy. Actually his proper name is ‘bObsweep*tm’. Well sir/m’am, there’s one Bob here already at #303….that would be yours truly…..so he’s now Bobby. Our new robotic vacuum, who arrived from Wayfair*tm, just like the LazyBoy chair who preceded him by almost a week. Anyway, we got him out of the box and there it was….a bag of parts and instructions….”Some Assembly Required”. Really??!! S–t!! So….SO….Miz. Jo and Rotzy have been down that road before, with varying degrees of success/failure, tho we’ve never worked on a robot before!! Long story short, somehow or other, WE DID IT!! Even had the proper batteries we needed on hand. And I guess we put Bobby together the way it said to because it works just fine. Ooops….I mean HE works fine. Our floors are in the best shape since we’ve been here!! We haven’t touched a broom, nor has our wet Swiffer*tm seen any action. It/he is a nice, deep red metallic colour….like that on an old Buick 1950-something Roadmaster….lights a-flashing whilst the sweeper broom runs non-stop in a counter clockwise motion. Guess what….it/he even finds his own way back to his parking dock/garage to automatically re-charge when he’s done. Had a wee bit of a ‘re-location problem’ after moving it/him from the bedroom to the living room behind my chair. ‘Do we ever talk to him’? you ask. Sure we do….but, of course, just when he’s cleaning. In truth, there was a little green-eyed monster in me after he first arrived….you know, two guys/Bobs in the same home….but got over it quickly when we changed him to ‘Bobby’…..,the ONLY people who still call me ‘Bobby’ are a handfull of olde football-types from 40-50 years ago (*see below) But there’s a new Bobby here at #303-555 Harris Place and he’s doing just fine, thanks! By the bye, we actually had to fill out the enclosed Adoption Papers to make everything legal….making Miz. Jo and Rotzy his ‘parental unit’. No s–t! We also need to think about taking out some insurance on him because Bobby didn’t come cheap….we paid Wayfair*tm more $ for him than I spent on my first car!! Which happened to be a ’57 Dodge Mayfair….imagine….white with gold trim and BIG fins. Jeez….I DO hope Bobby lasts longer than the Dodge, which croaked in about nine months. Guess we better call Brokerlink….you think?
Football And Stuff
It’s Sat Nov 2 as I write this….11:00AM….and I just got off the fone making arrangements with one of those ‘olde football types’ (*see above) having been teammates on the PJCVS 1960 Warriors to go and check out the Brant’s Ford District Sr. High School Football Championship game at 2:00PM….or it it 1:00? We’ll find out….but the big thing, seeing that’s it’s only something like 5C, is that Rotzy’s gonna have to wear long blue jeans, shoes and sox for the first tyme in over FIVE months. Gonna have to call a tyme-out and start organizing a late fall ‘ensemble’. Will finish this off tomorrow….hopefully scores and all. *UPDATE* Sun Noon…was glad I wore jeans, sox, a nice warm LL Bean coat. Three of us oldsters were glad the rain stopped upon our arrival, then the sun even came out and it shone on the St John’s College Juniors as they beat the Panthers from Paris in a hard-fought O.T. game! The Senior’s game had BCIVS Mustangs up against ACS Assumption Lions, who were about 12 points up on BCI at half-tyme. Anyway, the three of us decided (unanimously) we had MORE than enough of some complete moron announcer who couldn’t shut up….methinks he saw/heard himself as an NBA announcer calling Game Seven and/or a totally obnoxious talking head really getting wound up at WWF’s RAW XXXVI. Also, when he wasn’t yapping off….which was rare….the music he brought along with him was…………bad! No….awful! It wasn’t just our threesome, there were a LOT of parents and grandparents in the crowd who shuddered and cringed just as we did. Anyway, I’m betting/guessing the Lions prevailed over the Mustangs in the second half. And next year we’ll take ear plugs, just in case.
*Thought Of The Day…Everyone needs to believe in something. I believe I’ll have a beer.