Jan 9 – Rotzy pours cold water over a lot things this week!

Rotzy grumbles a lot this week: water fountains, NFL coaches, jurisprudent shortsightedness and more.

‘What Ever Happened To’ ‘Water Fountains’? No, not the ones like ‘The Princess Margaret Fountain’ beside the CNE grandstand, I mean DRINKING fountains. They used to be all over the place in Brant’s Ford! Indoors, outdoors, everywhere!! Some had ‘on-off’ handles, some were operated with a ‘push-button’ and many ran constantly. Good, healthy Grand River water…because they started adding flouride to it in 1945….Rotzy’s birth year….which did nothing to improve the taste, but it didn’t matter because we had ‘the healthiest teeth in Canada! Still, one of my favourite things about visiting my Grandpa Lovett at Kew Beach in Toronto The Good in the early 1950’s was T.O.’s drinking water!….of course they had drinking fountains too, even more than Brant’s Ford….but their water came out of Lake Ontario and it was COLD compared to The Grand. But in the Telephone City it was The Grand, just like all the other cities, burgs and hamlets as it made its’ way to Lake Erie. So….SO….I’m thinking, can I pick a ‘Favourite Fountain’ and a ‘Least Favourite? Piece of cake for the former….the fountain on Colborne St in Alexander Park! It was half a block from 59 Peel St, we played tag, hide ‘n seek, football and even some baseball there (in spite of the abundance of hundred-year-olde maples and oaks), sat on the giant cast iron ship’s cannon and fired 4″ ‘cannon crackers’ at the ‘enemy’ on Victoria Day….the blasts barely cleared the fountain, which operated 24/7, and the large cast iron horses’ watering trough, which was surely an attraction during the daytyme as all the delivery wagons….ice, bread, milk, etc….watered their animals there with the drivers helping themselves to the fountain. Well, choosing the Least Favourite Fountain is just as easy, tho the actual fountain itself isn’t really the issue….the LOCATION was the problem! The Btfd PUC Bus Terminal on the south-west corner of Market Square….the fountain ran 24/7 in the downstairs public washroom, and the smell of pee and poop down there was just overwhelming!….24/7! One would ‘really have to go’ if one chose to enter the facility….and one departed ASAP. Hence, that fountain did not appeal to the thirsty. Good riddance to that one and Rotzy’s betting all the rest are long gone too….and I WILL check Alexander Park and have a sip if the fountain’s still there? Just thinking that the ‘current’ and ‘just past’ generations probably have NEVER drunk water from a fountain….it’s always in a plastic bottle. A while back in Zehr’s there was a large display rack of bottles of ‘SMART WATER’….like, this product will make you SMART, or smarter than you already are….a bluish tinge to the otherwise clear plastic bottle. I said (to myself, tho I was LOL’ing) “Ho-Lee cow, Toad (or something like that), people are paying $3 bucks for a bottle of water.” As I pointed my cart toward the check-outs there stood a young father (he looked about 12 or 13 and had half a cartful of Huggies*tm) checking out the SMART WATER*tm pyramid display and Rotzy immediately ‘pounced’. “Hey guy, do you think that drinking Smart Water is really gonna make you and your family smarter? At three dollars a bottle”? “Sorry”?? he said. “If you use Brant’s Ford TAP WATER….which is free/gratis….almost….You and your Wife and Son (I ‘guessed’ at ‘Son’ because I saw a baby boy on the Huggies*tm box) will have healthier teeth….and in spite of the fact that your tap water tastes similar to Buckleys cough syrup, the money you’ve saved will have you all smiling and flashing your ‘pearly-whites’ ”!! “OK, OK, Sir! I’ll put my three bottles back. I didn’t know about the….. …..’pearls’??….and thanks, Sir”! “Good on you, Son…. you’re smart’.

We Had Some Good Responses….
….on “F/N”s article(s) last week on the cop killing as well as Cdn law and order in general, which is ‘broken down’ these days tho it well might be just plain ‘broken’. Check this one out….from Zoomer News last Wed ayem. Ottawa. A 20-yr old white male arrested following a TWO year investigation involving several police forces with regard to the safety of Fed Gov’t Buildings and one or more embassies which apparently have been targeted as potential trouble areas. Once again….a TWO YEAR investigation!….OK? The case was remanded for 2 or 3 weeks, methinks. OK? Now the ‘suspect’ is currently out and about, because ‘Bond was NOT required’. OK? NO IT’S NOT OK!! Rotzy’s sorry, but I didn’t get to record Hizzhonour’s statement as to why ‘NO BOND IS NEEDED for this suspect in THIS TYPE of case’….altho the wording the judge used was similar to being ‘released on his own recognizance’….VERY similar in fact. But hang on a second or two….this isn’t some guy getting caught stealing hub caps! Like, WTF goes??!! Unless the police have ‘really mucked up’/got the ‘wrong guy’, he’ll ‘pull a Harry Houdini’ and just disappear? Whatever. It says here he should have been ‘detained/held’. Still.

It Was A Busy Week….
for Miz Jo’s ‘Wellness Recovery Program’….over to Life Lab’s excellent facility in Paris for bloodwork Monday. DOH! Closed….so we went back Wed aft. Appt. Fri ayem with the Nurse Practitioner at Dr Ivan’s…..her somewhat elevated B/P was ‘due to WCS’ (white coat syndrome*see below) but she moved the Toledos up to 88 lbs!….four closer to the 100-mark than the last weigh-in! One anti-biotic down and one to go….less than a week at this point….and she also got some new meds for after the A/B’s. Thurs aft she had a second visit with Raj the physio therapist, who gave her a ‘thumbs-up’ one week after her initial assessment….so the exercise program is definitely helping. Friday was the monthly visit/checkup with Warren The EMS Guy (for both of us) and Miz’ Jo’s ‘elevated B-P’ (*see above) was getting back to norm. Rotzy’s vitals (oxygen, lungs, B/P) were fine….see ya next month Warren.

I wonder if the “F/N” readership was as happy as Rotzy to hear the first of the EIGHT young Toronto The Good murderesses (13-18 & charged with Murder 2) was released on Bail early last week….*already noted in this space….and by the tyme you’re reading this, MOST, if not ALL of them will be out of gaol! Lovely!! **Heads up to T.O. Winos….don’t be waving your Zing or Mazel Tov around at night….or at all….those bad-ass girls/children are out….and we all know what happened last tyme.

#1 & #2 rules for football coaches…at any level. *Don’t ‘run up the score’ vs your opponent **don’t go outta your way to make the other coach or his team look bad. It WILL come back one day and BITE YOUR ASS!! You hear me, Andy Reid?! Rotzy always saw you as a VERY good coach. But, how can that be so now..,..after you captured the ‘Not-All-That Impressive “F/N” D.O.T.W. Award. The FIRST Dink Of The Week recipient of 2023, and probably the FIRST EVER in the ‘Sports’ category! Andy, Andy, Andy! WTF were you thinking? Was it a ‘dare’ or a ‘bet’? Your AFC-leading K/C Chiefs are clobbering the sad sack Oakland/Los Angeles/Oakland again/ now Las Vegas Raiders on the field and the scoreboard. Late in the 4th qtr and your Chiefs have the ball nearing the Raiders’ goal line (like all afternoon). The play is called, they break the huddle and line up in a formation (from National Lampoon?), run the play (from The Twilight Zone?)…..and somehow it’s a TD!!? Mercifully it’s called back for Holding by a Chief’s lineman. Not funny anymore. Tough s–t, Andy….but in all my 20-some years playing/coaching football, Rotzy has never seen anything like it! Only thing ‘close’ was the olde movie, ‘Knute Rockne All American’. The film’s ‘action’ segments depicting The Fighting Irish of Notre Dame were so poorly done (it was made circa 1940) it was funny….almost. Andy Reid’s Chiefs weren’t funny either but the way K/C broke huddle and went into their formation was ‘sort of’ like Knute’s. Anyway, by the tyme you’re reading this there will have been apologies and perhaps a fine from the NFL. Whatever. Next tyme you play the Raiders, Andy….best keep your head up and watch your back.

*Thought Of The Day…Like the fly said as he walked across the mirror….”well now, that’s another way of looking at it”.

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