Mar 2 – Miz Jo, OK; Rotzy, not so much

Readers Write
   And this one sent along a number of Bumper Stickers that would be more than fitting/suitable for oldsters who still get behind the wheel, so check ’em out! *

  • When I was young, all I wanted was a nice BMW. Now I don’t care about the ‘W’
  • My wife and I are SO old we don’t buy green bananas
  • I’m so old, whenever I dine out they ask for the money up front!’      (*thanks, and keep ’em coming folks)

There Was An Item….
….in “From Nakina” in the T-Star’s Feb 19th Editon regarding the ‘busy week’ Miz. Jo and Rotzy were facing and wondering if we’d get everything checked off the list. Well folks, dont’cha know it was mission accomplished!……altho I’m not gonna tell y’all a deliberate untruth, and/or indicate that it was a piece of cake. Because some of it definitely wasn’t. Anyway, on the List was Miz. Jo’s follow-up appointment with her plastic surgeon last Friday, after having ‘The Thing’ removed from her nose beside her right eye. Well, after waiting an hour and a half, in her (3 or 4 minute) appointment with the doc he said ‘you’re all done with me’, no malignancies, no further treatments required, then he wrote a Rx for some Vit E cream to help heal the area of the incision, made almost a month ago. It was a pretty happy ride home…and thanks to all for your concern and the kind words.  It meant/means a lot!

The First Week We Were Here….
….in Brant’s Ford….or even maybe before that….I was told ‘everybody gets their gas and smokes out on The Rez’….hence I did/still do make my weekly run out to Kanata. Yep, the one that has a Timmy’s, and is about a mile past the new ‘pot farm’. So….SO…. recently my petrol has been between .99 and $1.01 a litre. I enjoy the drive and am saving .08 to .12 cents a litre vs Btfd prices. They (sometymes) ask if I have a status card and I always have to say ‘no’….perhaps adding “but I’ll more than gladly change my name to ‘Tonto Rotz’ or ‘Running Bare’ if ya’ll can get me one. Having said that, last Monday….just after having put $47.00 of Kanata gasoline in Norm The Truck…some ‘friends’ here at #555 Harris Place said ”you getting your gas in Hamilton”? ”Uh-uh….just filled up in Ohsweken”. “Well it’s 86.7 in The Hammer!”. “Do tell!!….you need a card”!? “Naw….it’s not on a Rez…just two private stations ”at war” with each other and it drops even lower at night tyme”!! Gonna hafta check into this on Monday….s–t, I may not have to change my name!….it’d be a bit further drive but .15 or .16 cents a litre cheaper! By the bye, can I get someone in/around Nakina to let me know the price for Reg Gas up there these days. I’m thinking the last I/we filled up at PTS (in Sept 2018) it was near to $1.50. Stay tuned.

Lotto Max Winner
…I don’t know who won the $70 Million Lotto Max last week, but I know who did NOT! Damn. And I was SO sure I/we had it locked up! Damn….again! Anyway, I heard something somewhere about ‘Mr Millions’ indicating he’s is young, single….and earns a living bagging groceries. Notice I said ‘earns’, in the present tense and not ‘earned’, indicating he may/will keep on working. Hello?! Well, sixty years ago a 15-yr old Rotzy was bagging groceries at Calbecks for .70 an hour…and if the new millionaire wants to continue working….in spite of his LARGE bank account….he may need a leather couch and a chat with somebody….you think?

Comparing/Adapting And Stuff
….There’s always something new coming up in our ongoing ‘Nakina vs Brantford thing’….not to say that the ‘vs’ indicates any kind of contest between the two places, but as much as anything to note the major differences. I mean, for two decades Miz. Jo and yours truly had resided in a ‘remote’ town of 300 people, at the end of Hwy 584 (look it up) surrounded by ‘bush’, a three day drive north of Brant’s Ford, where your idle tyme is spent fishing/hunting/going to bingo/curling/imbibing/then more fishing and hunting….to a city of 120,000 people, and everything that goes with it…the good and the bad. Well, I guess that’s where the ‘adapting’ comes in. Yet, geography aside, the biggest factor always comes down to the sheer number of people, and the populous usually answers all the other concerns/questions. One local I know breaks it down as such….”on a hot August night, 120,000 Brantfordians means 240,000 sweaty arm pits”!! I’ll leave that one with you for a while (*see below)….and pass on some recent facts/findings ”From Nakina”s Stats and Research Department. For starters Btfd has 190 Restaurants….or 187, depending on what review list you read….but it IS a lot of eateries. Speekeezies is #1, and tho we haven’t tried them yet, we have had Zanders and Montana, both Top Ten. There are 238 ‘Nail Spas’ and we’ve used two (for toenail cutting and fully staffed by Orientals) tho Rotzy has a new Foot Lady thru the Diabetes Group, so now it just costs $10 bucks for Miz. Jo. Plus tip. As to hair salons/barbershops….233….five less than Nail Spas. Automotive Brake Shops (*like Midas, CTC, and also with mufflers, tires etc.) 158. I realize that’s rather high, but as I already indicated (*see above) it falls right back to the sheer number of people/drivers. But in this case, there is another ‘driving factor’, no pun intended….excessive speed/agressive driving!! And it was found to be a “F/N” Fact that over 80% of drivers in Brant’s Ford fit the description… and age don’t matter. Green light….hammer down on the gas and DON’T let whoever’s beside you get their nose in front of you….in spite of the red light just ahead….then hammer on the brakes. Yours truly is getting quite good at ignoring stupidity, and they have zero idea that Norm The Truck could/would blow them away if I wanted. Also, I almost forgot that nearly 50% of that 80% bunch are rude/ignorant….bird flipping/air punching/garbage mouthing. (*you may recall a Rotzy ‘language outburst’ in last week’s column, but that was clearly a ‘different situation’, right?) There is no final number yet in on the number of drinking establishments….we’re doing an ‘all inclusive thing’ and it seems the number is gonna be high. Lastly but not leastly….oddly enough, we totalled up the following and this is what we got….Beer Stores 3….In And Out Stores (LCBO) 2. Hey we’ll get back to y’all with more interesting stats next week.

*Thought Of The Day…I’m more confused than a chameleon in a bag of Skittles(*tm)

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