Dec 19 – From bury to merry…it Christmas time in Ontario again

Rotzy’s covering all the seasonal basis and then some…from Christmas trees to political bows, from burgers to burghers…no stoned left unturned but his Christmas message from Miz Jo and himself, is timely, on targets and touching too.

Eeen-y, Meen-y, Mine-y Moe….one Mamaburger(*tm) with Cheese, to go! To room #622 at Brant’s Ford General Hospital….you see, Miz Jo and Rotzy had a ‘meeting’ (of sorts) last Monday about food, HER food, BGH Food in particular. Which she is not at all fussy about….actually she is VERY fussy when it comes to BGH Chefs, she usually will ‘take a pass’ unless it’s chili con carne nite….and maybe a couple soups….then she matter-of-fact-like said ”could you bring me a hamburger tomorrow around 2:00”. Rotzy knew this was coming from past experience(s) and said ”OK….like a McD’s 1/4 pounder w/cheese or an A&W Teen Burger”? “Yes!” ”No prob.” Been awhile since we’ve had A&W so I went there ‘shortcutting’ through the Can. Tire parking lot. (*see below) I decided on a Mamaburger*tm W/Cheese and it was very obviously a fine decision! Miz. Jo went at the thing like a hound-dog on a pork chop!! eventually stopping to catch her breath and deciding to save the rest….2 or 3 bites….for ‘supper’. Was good to see her eating. But getting back to the CTC parking lot….Rotzy’s noticed something going on along the easternmost part of the property along where Brantford’s largest Xmas Tree Lot sets up every December….and there are a couple/few dozen of these 5 ft high ‘boxy-things’ all lined up in a row, so I went over to see what they are. First off they all say ‘Tesla’ on the front. Well yours truly caught on just like that! (snap of the fingers) and I said (to myself) “Jeez Toad….seems you’ve just found/stumbled onto Btfd’s FIRST multiple pump gas station for electric cars! No Diesel I’m sure but I wonder if they’ll have Regular (60W) and Ultra (100W). And why are they so CLOSE to each other? Not a car length between them I’m sure. I also wonder…..”Whoa there Toad….that’s TWO ‘wonder’s in a row but I’d like to know, OK? When I overfilled my 1957 Dodge Mayfair, or any other vehicles I’ve owned/driven since 1962, the gasoline spilled to the ground, hence I’d really have to be careful with a lit cigarette. If you should overfill your Tesla….aka your ‘Muskmobile’….what happens to the electricity? Like, where does it go? F’r instance, if you’re filling up here at the Can Tire Tesla Pumps, those 300 Xmas Trees could be ashes quicker than you can say “Do you see what I see”?! Just sayin’, folks.

By the Bye….
….Zoomer Radio’s daily noon hour call-in show last Thursday was all about Xmas Trees, with people who farm them, people who harvest them, people who complain about them not being sustainable and people who buy them to decorate. One caller ‘really got my attention”! Last year she paid $200 for their tree! TWO HUNDRED BUCKS!! About the same as I paid for my Dodge (*see above) Not all decorated and ready to go….just the tree! And, this year? She did her homework, looked around…..found a farmer, not a ‘Xmas tree farmer’ just a ‘farmer’ with some trees on his 200 acres, who said ”gimme $30 and take your choice”. They did, and took home a beautiful, 7ft fir! A fraction of the cost and way better than last year’s, which they discovered (too late) had a bent trunk. Then came a call from a real dink….a ‘tree hugger guy’, who basically guaranteed Canada is ‘running out of Xmas Trees’!! The lady guest on the panel…a grower and a top biologist tried to set the dink straight but he was having none of it….so Rotzy gave him a cough….OK, a ‘far cough’….and switched to CBC.

Things Rotzy Would Like….
….to forget about in 2022. Such as the whole ****ing thing. I mean if 2022 was wine, it’s NOT gonna be a ‘vintage’. Politics? Are you kidding? Like our own Premier. Yes, Doug Ford. I admit to saying he was doing as good a job as ANY politico in regard to all things COVID, but more recently I said (to myself) ”Ho-Lee s–t, Toad… sure blew it on that one! Lookit what they (the Aud. General?) laid on him a week ago….almost $10 Billion wasted/missing. And then the ‘Mayors Bill’ he just ‘rammed through QP’ that gives the Mayors of T.O. and Ottawa ‘superpowers’ when it feels they’re needed. OK? NO! Not when they can get it with only ONE THIRD of their council’s vote/support….ONE THIRD is NOT democratic!! How can Ford do that? you ask. The word is not ‘can’….it’s ‘did’. And it’s called a ‘MAH-JOR-I-TEE’. If Rotzy didn’t know better….and maybe I don’t….these days I’d say Doug Ford comes across as a combination of his late brother and Trump. Scary stuff, that is. COVID? you ask. Still here. And ’22 was unkind to the Leafs and the Blue Jays….but the Argos took the Grey Cup and saved some face for Tronna….but since they average less than 10,000 fans a game! at BMO Field, the celebrations were diminished somewhat. Putin’s war against The Ukraine is as terrible as ever. With no end in sight! And his counterpart/enemy in The Ukraine was just named the prestigious Time Magazine ‘Person Of The Year’! Alas, Putin had long since captured the not-so-prestigious ”F/N” Dink Of The Year Award”. (*Elon Musk was a distant 2nd). Fats Domino died down in The Big Easy….Jerry Lee in Ferraday, Miss. and Ronnie Hawkins doesn’t reside at Mortgage Manor up near Peterboro anymore. There’s a handful of ‘do-gooders’ in Niagara Falls (Ont) who are trying for all their worth to close down Marineland. And Game Farm. Buzz Off! and leave Flipper, Namu and the Seals alone….they LOVE it there! The thing is, 2022 was too much like 2020 and 2021….we’re in a rut, folks. A really BIG rut.

But….’Tis The Season, Right!?
”To be Jolly”!!! So let’s just ”Ho-Ho-Ho” right into it! Maybe even ”Deck The Halls”, altho Rotzy’s NOT great on a step ladder, so best someone else hangs the ‘Boughs of Holly’, OK? And the sound of carols fills the air….and it’s all quite magical. *Then someone says ”how in hell does this guy (that would be yours truly) go from the ‘master of gloom and doom’ in the above item to the ‘happiest elf on the shelf’? You can’t do that”! “Really? Watch me”!

This is the last Times Star edition before December 25th and therefore tyme for Rotzy and Miz. Jo to send our annual best wishes to the “From Nakina” Readership….”May your Christmas be everything you hope and pray it to be….whether it be white or green….whether it’s on your own or with others….whether you choose turkey or ham, or Chinese Food take-out. And if you’ve ”hung your stockings by the chimney with care” we hope Santa doesn’t put ‘a lump of coal’ in yours. Remember the reason for Christmas….to celebrate the birth of Christ! And to quote Tiny Tim….”God Bless us, everyone”. *A Very Happy Christmas to You and Yours….et Bonne Annee! Bob and Jo Ann…”From Nakina”.

*Thought Of The Day…”If if’s and but’s were candy and nuts, what a Merry Christmas we’d all have”! (*this TOTD is an ‘annual “F/N” thing’…. from Don Meredith on NFL Monday Night Football a LONG tyme ago)

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