Dec 23 – Nat, Dino, Frank…keep dreamin’ boys !

Parking, no white Christmas and new year resolutions

Readers Write
    And this week’s message(s) obviously came from a senior citizen, perhaps giving younger folks a glimpse into the workings of a mind that has been drawing OAS for a decade. Or more. Check ’em out: *When I say ‘the other day’, I could be referring to any tyme between yesterday and fifteen years ago. **I’m bored. I think I’ll drive to the mall, find a great parking spot, then sit in my car with the ‘reverse lights’ on. (*see below)

The ‘Art’ Of Parking….
….and when yours truly says ‘art’, I am not using the term loosely/frivolously, in fact a 92.9F/M radio commercial that Ford*tm is using to sell their new SUV was/is really pushing the ‘Driver Assist’ option and how it helps immensely with parking the vehicle. The ‘customer’ is talking very candidly about checking how well he parks….EVERY tyme!….front and back/both sides to see he’s evenly sitting between the lines, be they yellow or white, all around. Well, soon as I heard it, dont’cha know I said (to myself) “Hey Toad, that is YOU….unfortunately, without the ‘Driver Assist’. (Well, what’s with that snide remark?) “Look Toad, you’re 1 for 3 this morning….a good job and a passing mark at Circle ‘K’. But you were almost touching the yellow paint with your right rear tire at Zehr’s Mkt!….Fail….then at The In And Out Store….bloody awful!” “Well, I got honked at (*see below), plus the one-finger salute and lost my focus/concentration…..I know, I know, I know….’Fail’. Well, I guess I’m not a very good parker….yet….after a little over a year in the City….but Rotzy isn’t a quitter either. I’ll closely examine/re-examine EVERY attempt, wherever it is! and maybe I’ll go down to the back of the lot here at #555 Harris Place and practice. You think? The bottom line…and this is not a ‘whine with cheese’….is that 20 years of ‘parking’ up in Nakina is a hard egg to crack. In truth, up there (unless you’re at the Yellow Store in Geraldton there are virtually no lines) you don’t often ‘park’ your vehicle, it’s more like ‘leaving it for a while’. Lock it? Nope….hence yours truly is still getting used to horns beeping….we didn’t lock our house either….truth told, you often leave your pick-up/SUV running in winter. BUT…..Miz. Jo and Rotzy live in Brant’s Ford now, so….SO…..’when in Rome’!! You get the drill, right? That means I ALSO need to start driving 8 or 9 k/hr faster and running yellow arrows at intersections regularly!! Not to forget the parking. Whoa!

It’s Saturday 10:00AM….
….as I write this week’s column, which I expect won’t see the stores until after the 25th….at the point where some of us will still be sitting down to left-over turkey of some description…..hopefully including Jo Ann’s turkey/rice pilaf here at Unit #303! And also at the point when yours truly will NOT have to listen to that guy singing ”Felice Navida” for 11 months. By the bye, I just heard the weather report for the next week and it seems like Nat King Cole, Dean Martin, Frank Sinatra ”dreaming of a white Christmas” is nothing more than a pipe dream….at least it is down Btfd way. Sunny and a High of +4 to 6C today and Sunday, +8C! Monday!!! Certainly NOT ”like the ones I used to know”….especially in Nakina. I told Miz. Jo that ‘somehow we’ll just have to cope with it’.

It’s Sunday AM….
    as I finish off “From Nakina” for next week….with wall to wall sunshine! So….SO….I got home yesterday about 12:15 and prepared to unload/unpack the stuff I’d bought on my daily buckboard run and Miz. Jo gives me ‘the look’ and asking ”everything all right”? “I got good news and bad news”. “Gimme the good first”. “You won $30 bucks on your scratch and win ticket”. “Great….and”? ”I got honked at at The In And Out Store”! ”So what’s the dilio? you always get honked at there….you just wrote an item about it”. ”This was a loud/sharp blast from a LOL (little old lady, 5-10 years younger than Rotzy) in a silver SUV”. “What happened….you cut her off”? ”I wasn’t driving….I was on foot….walking back to Norm The Truck….in the pedestrian crossing zone, mostly….but obviously not fast enough for the LOL’s liking”! “Oh, goodness me!….so….SO…..did you give her your ‘standard Merry Xmas greeting”? “Well, sort of….but not really. I told her ”#@&$ &##….sorry I ruined your entire week”….and added ”you’re the heck of me”!! I gave up on New Years Resolutions about 50 years ago, but if I have a change of mind/heart I suppose ‘improve my parking’ and ‘walk faster’ might head up the list. Don’t bet on it though.

Stuff
Some things don’t change and “From Nakina” is happy (and not in the least surprised) that our kindly landlords here at 555/575/535, Skyline Living, have managed to hold onto the title ‘Worst Snow Removal…Commercial Division….in Brant’s Ford’ for the 2019/20 season. After the most recent 1-2 inch snowfall, no plowing equipment showed at all….the salting truck did arrive at about 6:00AM the day AFTER the snow. This seems to be their plan of attack. By the bye, in a poll taken here 555 Harris Place, nearly everybody’s favourite part of Skyline’s contractor’s effort was/is the two guys armed with handshovels, followed by two salt spreaders….also by hand, from 5-gal pails!! Stay tuned, just in case Btfd actually does see a heavy snowfall…like, say, 5 or 10 inches!!

*Thought Of The Day…I’m thinking that ‘Drink Responsibly’ means don’t spill it.

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