July 5 – health check, tech challenge and Canada shame?

Rotzy updates everyone on the state of the ‘Onion (him) and his use of technology.

About Two Weeks Ago….
….I suspect that about 98% of Canadians had never heard of Lytton, B.C. The same could be said about most BC’ers, unless you were/are right on top of their forest industry….or big on river rafting as they are/were the self-proclaimed capital of rafting in Cda, since Lytton sits right on the confluence of the Thompson and Fraser Rivers. Rotzy’s not sure how the rafters have been doing but tree harvesting went in the tank in 2007 with soaring lumber prices. But Lytton suddenly made the front pages as they recorded Canada’s hottest temp. ever….46.7C….as they found themselves under an extensive ‘heat dome’! Then to show it was no fluke, they came back a day or two later with an incredible 49.6!! Those are temps more apt to be found in Death Valley, Cal. than in the interior of British Columbia. But ‘the worst’ quickly followed the near-50 degrees….the Lytton Wildfire. The 2016 Census reported a population of 249, and as of today (July 4) it appears to be 0, virtually every building flattened (RCMP Detach/school/clinic/etc.) with a dozen people missing/still unaccounted for!….and with conditions still too dangerous for search and rescue attempts. Albertans are now bracing and getting precautions in place as the ‘heat dome’ is moving eastward. Stay tuned.

Health Update….
….and other funny stuff too. By the bye, not that the olde guy isn’t used to a certain amount of ‘pressure’ from tyme to tyme with this “F/N” column, certain restrictions, deadlines and the like….but THIS week was/is a (*R*) “F/N” beaut!! You know what? Fri and Sat are my writing/composing days, using notes I’ve scribbled down (and I DO mean scribbled) during the week…from (roughly) 6:00AM to Noon, or 1:00PM. Not THIS week…..no, no, no. Bell Internet*tm went ‘hide and go seek’ right from the get-go Sat….and the harder I searched for it, the deeper things got (*R) ****ed up! It was awful and as at 5:00PM Sat, Rotzy was battling through nervous breakdown #3 as I snapped Tall Boy #5! (or was it #8?)  So I said (to myself), (”Hey Toad, don’t sweat it none….you’ll come down Sun morning, the whole “F/N” mess will sort itself out, then you’ll pump out a helluva column….and all will be well”. Oh really? ‘Twas an even more intense session….but  alas, I cut myself short right quick as I knew help was on the way as our son Paul (not his real name) was coming with the wife to ‘set up’ our cell fones (*see below), Hence, firstly I’ll axe him to fix my ASUS*tm as well as installing our new Brita*tm kitchen tap filter. OK, OK, OK….back to Rotzy’s Health Report. Doing real good! Doing well. Feeling fine. Not faring too bad. I’m so-so. Hey….just having some funn with y’all! Got my ‘walking papers’ with V.O.N. two weeks ago, then I had some more ‘drainage’ from my lower legs, hence I’m back there every three days for new bandages. They want me wearing those socks from hell….I ‘druther not! We’ll see what my doktor says when we meet again. By the bye, he’s sending me to some ‘vascular’ surgeon (in Hamilton) in regard to circulation in my lower leg, or the lack of it, waiting to hear from him/her, plus this week I’ll have V.O.N. Tues and Fri….and FINALLY we’re both ‘getting a dose’….our second one….(of Pfizer) down at the olde Market Square Wed, Miz. Jo at 1:25 and me 1:35. SO….SO….there you go! More or less current on the state of yours truly’s health. And as usual, Rotzy is the ideal patient, always doing what I’m told….OK, OK, OK….perhaps with the exception of compression socks.

All About Parking….Skyline-Style
    This has nothing with my ongoing ‘quest’ to put Norm The Truck between the orange lines on any/all parking lots….same distance from them on both sides….not too far ahead nor too far back….altho I still keep that in mind. This is about the note I/we got from our keepers two weeks back advising that our area must be kept MT from 7:00AM to 6:00PM, Mon to Fri for major repairs to the 8ft high wooden fence. Affecting 15 or 20 vehicles. That’s fine I/we said….BUT…..where will go. A staffer told me ‘there are available ‘V’ for visitor spots down on the west side of #575’….’thanks, but too far’ Rotzy replied. Adding ‘I’ll grab the silver 4 door’s spot, or one that the black Jeep(s) usually occupy….probably the small one with the star on it….he doesn’t live here but he’s here a LOT, often all nite….’getting his bean waxed’ (if I can say that?) or perhaps ‘having his oil changed’? Hey, it would be better than Mr Lube, you think? He’s a right friendly chap….always speaks before departing….but I’m gonna let HIM walk from the other side of #575. It’s 9:30 and I just went down for a quick break/puff, said Hi to three lady-staffers and no one mentioned my ‘new’ parking spot….nor were any ‘parking squatters’ around. But if I DO get any static, I’ll stick Norm right beside the door in a ‘prime wheelchair spot’ as the fellow who holds/held it died nearly a year ago. Hey, we’ll all get through this fence repair….I hope they don’t have to disturb too many grape vines that grow all over it.    

As I Mentioned….
    it was tyme for lesson #1 with our new cell fones! and Paul (not his real name) got the two new Samsung Galaxy units ‘ready to do’. I’d previously mentioned my lack of enthusiasm about owning one….and now two….of these things….because I’m scared of them….so I had to do a major (‘C’mon Toad, YOU can do this’) psyche job on myself….but likely not believing a word of it! Anyway, it seems that the Galaxy can do anything for you….not just take photos and/or put the coffee on. I could be ANYWHERE….in a bar in Taiwan, deciding to ‘Tai-wan on’ and then remembering to vacuum the apartment with Bubby The Robotic Vacuum! Then reality hit….I already forgot how/where to turn it on! S–t.

*Thought Of The Day….A Very Happy Canada Day (albeit belated) from Miz. Jo and Rotzy to those who are NOT ashamed to be CANADIAN!!!

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