Ya gotta find a laff here

Can February March?
No, But April May!

Did you hear about the painter who was hospitalized?
Reports say it was due to too many strokes!

Have you heard the joke about the butter?
I better not tell you, it might spread!

How do you know that carrots are good for your eyesight?
Have you ever seen a rabbit wearing glasses?

Music Teacher: What’s your favorite musical instrument?
Kid: The lunch bell!

What did the triangle say to the circle?
You’re pointless!

What do you call a ghost’s mom and dad?
Transparents!

What do you call a group of men waiting for a haircut?
A Barbercue!

What do you call a person that chops up cereal
A cereal killer!

What do you call a South American girl who is always in a hurry?
Urgent Tina!

What do you call two fat people having a chat?
A heavy discussion!

What kind of emotions do noses feel?
Nostalgia!

What kind of shorts do clouds wear?
Thunderwear!

What’s easy to get into but hard to get out of?
Trouble!

Where do boats go to when they get sick?
A dock!

Who cleans the bottom of the ocean?
A Mer-Maids!

Why can’t a leopard hide?
Because he’s always spotted!

Why can’t your nose be 12 inches long?
Because then it would be a foot!

Why did the barber win the race?
Because he took a short cut!

Why did the boy tiptoe past the medicine cabinet?
He didn’t want to wake the sleeping pills!

Why did the tomato turn red?
It saw the salad dressing!

Why did the tree go to the dentist?
To get a root canal!

Why don’t you see giraffes in elementary school?
Because they’re all in High School!

Why was the math book sad?
Because it had too many problems!

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