Oct 17 – Technology ain’t what it used to be.

Rotzy’s busy criticizing technological innovations at his condo…they arrive at a cave man’s pace when they do arrive. And you should read about NFL Tom Brady’s latest fumble.

Surveys And Stuff
Miz. Jo and Rotzy kicked back recently to complete a survey (”takes 10 min”) that arrived on her i-pod from Skyline Living, our ‘keepers’ here at #555 Harris Place, along with 335 and 575….a “How Are We Doing”?/”How Do You Like Us Now”? thing.(*see below) You know, building maintenance/cleanliness/lawns and landscaping….overall as well as individual units. Well, it wasn’t until I returned from my ‘buckboard run’ that I touched my ‘fob’ to the activator, then pushed the square ‘PUSH’ button to enter the Lobby. Well….it opened! The door. First try! And I said (to myself) ”Holy s–t Toad! It opened! The electric door opened! With just ONE push on the button”! To which the little olde lady on the inside (waiting to come out) advised ”They put a new opener on it yesterday.” ”Well Toad….I guess that means no more whacks, smacks, overhand rights, elbow smashes and cetera just to ‘gain entry’. Imagine Toad, no more cursing/nervous breakdowns/head butts/karate kicks or toting a ballpeen hammer…(in truth, I never did quite carry out the last three, tho I was close to the hammer!!) Imagine.” The little, olde lady asked “Karate kicks? Who and where is Toad”? I smiled and said “Hey Toad, let’s let the lady get on her way, eh? Thank you M’am, and have a great day”! So….SO….getting back to the survey, in particular “How Are We Doing”? I expect Miz. Jo and yours truly coulda/shoulda been ‘singing Skyline praises’ for a job well done, right? Maybe. With an *asterisk* the size of a beach ball accompanying it seeing as the door buzzer hadn’t worked properly for somewhere twixt 6 months and a year! ” “How Are We Doing”? Nice repair job Skyline….but your ‘response tyming’ really sucks!! Regardless of what we said in the survey. (*Rotzy does NOT use the term ‘sucks very often in this space. Sorry, but if the shoe fits….well, you know.

Grapevine….Skyline-style…
The repair of the entranceway door (*see above) sure has residents talking these days….altho none of them are marveling at how quickly Skyline managed to get it done. Meanwhile Rotzy is ‘having some funn’ these days….if I’m approaching said door at the same tyme as another oldster, rather than act as per my normal gentlemanly self and quickly buzz the buzzer, I’ll let him/her go first….to ‘experience the joy’ of the new opener! Well, guess what? A lot of Harris Place folks don’t/didn’t know it’s fixed, hence, as yours truly was ‘having some funn’ early this ayem, an olde guy I got behind ‘POUNDED’ the buzzer….but good!! Hey….I’m sure there are many of them/us who are unaware. Well, speaking of ‘unaware’, dont’cha know Rotzy and Miz. Jo were ‘unaware’ of something else here at 555 until last mid-week as I chatted with a couple #555 co-tenants about ”the door from Hell”, which, at that point in tyme hadn’t been fixed, the one lady dropped a bombshell (*see below). But I digress. We have seven floors here at #555….ditto for #335….and as well having the electric ‘entrance’ door, the door from the elevator lobby to the hallway here on Floor #1 is also ‘electric’! Floors #2 up to #7 are all MANUAL….and ‘general consensus’ strongly indictates that the sole reason the door on Floor #1 was ‘upgraded’ to Electric a year or three ago was to IMPRESS potential tenants as they toured the building. Like ‘and, check out the power door that leads to the hallway’! Anyway….getting to the aforementioned bombshell’, Rotzy isn’t as dumb as Rotzy looks, and Rotzy KNOWS what’s coming, hence Rotzy’s sure at that point there’s smoke coming outta my ears. As she fakes ‘smugness’, she says ‘THEY (#335) have power doors on ALL SEVEN FLOORS! They all signed a ‘demanding’ petition….and voila’! “Well good for them”, I lied. Stay tuned.

Stuff….
Tom Brady is getting more press than he needs these days….or wants. Front page on a number of those trashy rags at the Super Market….right beside the one that warns Brits about Queen Camilla ‘taking control’ of Buckingham Palace (*look out Chuck, lest ‘The Hound’ should slip her leash). Brady’s ‘troubled’ and he’s ‘in trouble’….it’s costing him lots and it’s gonna cost him a LOT more. His marriage….which one rag-mag at Zehr’s Market called ‘sexless’….is done, ‘cept for the money part….and his NFL Tampa Bay Buccaneers are NOT ‘the toast of the town’. But a NFL article Rotzy stumbled onto was simply hilarious! Too funny!! Joke of The Day material!! OK, OK, OK….rather than retire ‘a Patriot’ a couple years back, Tom left New England to play QB for Tampa Bay Bucs….at $30 Million per….and he played….very well. Then rather than retire this year, he returned/stayed in Tampa Bay where it has been up and down thus far in 2022. So….SO….when they played the Atlanta Falcons, Tommy got mad at one of the Falcons Defensive Linemen and Tommy kicked the guy. A report says ‘twice’! Another report says Tom ‘tried’ to kick the opponent’. Well sir/m’am, President Roger Goodell and the NFL apparently take this stuff seriously and Brady was smacked with an $11,000.00 fine! Eleven Thousand Dollars!!! Well, $11 G’s is laughable to a $30 Million Dollar Man! But it so happens that THIS man is soon gonna be paying ‘support’ for his ‘Ex’ and (four?) kids!! Rotzy’s betting the ‘settlement’ in this case will re-define the word ‘support’….whether a noun or a verb. Jeez Tom, you never had this s–t to deal with in all the years Robt. Kraft was signing your pay cheque and you were wearing Patriots Blue and Red!

Readers Write
Been a while, eh? These arrived last week from a pair of crusty/olde/curmudgeon-type readers. Nothing wrong with their sense of humour….or are they actually that “F/N” miserable? Check ’em out: *Today elementary kids all have iPhones. When I was a kid I put glue on my hands just so I could peel it off when it dried. *I finally figured out why I look so bad in pictures. It’s my face. * People will stop bugging you with questions if you answer back in interpretive dance. *I haven’t lost all my marbles yet, but there is a hole in the bag somewhere. *We keep a potato masher in a drawer because sometymes it’s fun not to be able to open that drawer. *Someone just honked at me to get me out of my parking spot faster so now I have to sit here until one of us dies. * How to parallel park: 1/ Park somewhere else; 2/ …. .. …. ….. ……… * A giraffe’s coffee would be cold by the tyme it reached the bottom of its’ throat….ever think about that? No. You only think about yourself! * It only takes one slow-moving person in the grocery store to destroy the illusion that I’m a nice person. * It’s fine to eat a ‘test’ grape in the produce dept. But you take one bite out of a rotisserie chicken in the Deli, and it’s all ”Sir, you have to leave”! Thanks guys….and keep ’em coming folks!!

*Thought Of The Day…I spend a lot of tyme holding the refrigerator door open looking for answers.

 

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