Not a happy camper these days. But then, how many of us are?
As of last Mon….June 1st….after listening to Jane Brown’s 5:30 AM newscast on Zoomer Radio down in Norm The Truck I learned that I/we STILL can’t get a haircut! as she went down the list of businesses that were being allowed to RE-open. Damn. I’ve had/have a few folks here at 555 Harris Place calling me the ‘hippie’ these days and a couple others tell me I should do a pony-tail. Not gonna happen. Then another fella told me about a ‘black market barber’, which obviously is illegal. The guy had a one chair shop, not to mention a lot of his own ‘rules’ and ‘hoops to jump through’, such as ‘customers must wear a mask’. How in hell you can cut hair when your subject looks like Jesse James is beyond me, but I’m not about to find out….hey, it’ll get clipped eventually. Anyway, Jane’s next item on her list of RE-openings caught me off-guard and I became SO excited I didn’t know whether to s–t or wind my watch!! BATTING CAGES are open! Wow!! So Rotzy can climb in there and take a swing at an Osuna 98 mph fastball/smoker; or a dirty, lowdown David Price curve or a slider; heck, they may even have a setting for an RJ Dickey ‘knuckler’. Then I said (to myself), “Hey Toad, what if the machine uses ‘softballs’ rather than the MLB Rawlings hardball”? ”No problemo…..I’ll just turn the dial to ‘Eddie Feigner’….(The King And His Court)….and he’ll serve up his famous ‘Drop’, blindfolded from 2nd base”! Haircut be damned, I betcha I’ll get ‘my swing’ back in no tyme!….the one that had yours truly hitting clean-up for the Hampton A’s in the mid-1980’s. However, the problem is I have no idea where I might find one of these batting cages?! Anybody help me out?
*Memo-To Andrea Horwath
This item was supposed to appear in last week’s “F/N” column, but I just simply ran outta space. In essence I was gonna try to get the Ont NDP leader/spokesperson to back off/take it easy/stop in her never-ending berating of Doug Ford in regard to the truly sorry-ass situation surrounding Nursing Homes in Ont. It was brought into the spotlight (*see below) by reports from the Armed Forces after they had been ‘re-cruited’ to assist staff at a number of these ‘homes’. It was a known fact before the military’s involvement that 80% of Ontario’s COVID-19 related deaths were at these ‘facilities’. Then came the military’s reports (*see above) that really grabbed everyone’s attention….as to what goes on behind the fancy-schmantzy frontages/gardens/entranceways to these ‘places’….that was the first thing that caught Rotzy’s eye after hearing the heart-breaking tales of patients on the inside, and I’m guessing/betting that it’s even worse than what we’ve heard/read. But, back to Ms. Horwath, who initially….and for way too long after that…set her sights on Doug Ford and his PC’s. She didn’t simply ‘set her sights’….she near went into OCBD Mode….implying Ford was responsible for the entire Seniors Housing mess. Hey Andrea! There have been 11 Ont Premiers since Leslie Frost’s days of calling the shots at Queens Park….of EVERY political stripe, including a stint for YOUR party under Bob Rae….and if you/we use ‘circa 1955’ as a starting point/guide, it says here that is how long the seniors mess goes back to. And each one of the eleven has had a hand in creating and/or not fixing it. You’re welcome Andrea. As to Ford….Rotzy didn’t vote for him….didn’t like his ‘style’ pre-coronavirus, and cetera. But as to his handling of the mess that is COVID-19 for the past three months, he’s done a very admirable job. Better than the guy in Ottawa, tho JT knows enough to button up when Trump’s trying to rattle him. The other day a (CBC?) reporter said ‘that’s the Canadian way’. Rotzy Rant complete!
Changes…And Adapting (*see below)
Whilst standing in line at Zehr’s Market yesterday with some 20 or 25 other wannabe shoppers, it occured to me I was doing something I swore off long ago….probably 50 years or more….was/is exactly that, ‘standing in line’. And I was VERY firm about it….whether it was a grocery store, gas station, sports event, Beer Store/LCBO, bank, barber shop (remember them?), you-name-it. Yours truly would NOT line up for ANYTHING! Ever. I’d either go elsewhere, come back later, wait until later/another day, or simply not bother. Well, welcome to Shopping 2020 Style and Rotzy is getting used to/learning (*see above) a ‘ritual’ that is totally new to me…’standing in line’. The bottom line is simple….if you want it/need it you WILL wait. That’s the way it is, with ALL stores and businesses only allowing a relatively small number of customers in at once, and will continue to be for longer than I/we care to think about. The other bottom line is that yours truly is handling this ‘lineup thingy’ a LOT better than some other (usually mask-ed) shoppers…who are given to letting anybody within earshot know their thoughts/feelings, which, sadly enough, aren’t often very pleasant. Hey….stay cool folks….and stay safe.
….and this is a very well written piece which was thoughtfully forwarded to “F/N”HQ. *Regarding COVID-19….I heard ‘we’re all in the same boat’. But we’re not. Your ship might be shipwrecked and mine might not be. Or vice-versa. *Some family of 4 just received $3400 from the ‘stimulus’ while another family of 4 received $0. *Some have faith in God and expect miracles during this 2020. Others say the worst is yet to come. *We are all on different ships during this storm experiencing a very different journey. Realize that and be kind.
*Thought Of The Day…You think it’s bad now?! Well, in 20 years our country will be run by people who’ve been home-schooled by day drinkers.